Gabon Africa 2010

I've been home for a couple days now and I thought I would finish my blogs on here and leave you with the link for my new blog if you are interested. 


Its such a weird feeling to be back home. I am kinda in a place of mixed emotion as I continue to process all that God showed me over the last greatest month of my life. It really was transforming and now I have to figure out how all those truths affects changes that I need to make in my life. 


I feel like I never left home and that the month was just a really good dream! But I am sure slowly as I catch up on my sleep things will become more real. Right now I am randomly waking up in the middle of the night for a couple hours and then I fall back asleep. Fun Stuff. Then during the day I randomly get all restless and feel like I don't know what to do with myself. I think I am driving myself and my parents crazy. I kinda feel like a chicken running around with its head cut off in all different directions. By that I mean I am excited for what God has for this next chapter of my life, but filled with sadness that I am away from my amazing new family members. Talking to them and looking at pictures is the only thing that fills the gigantic hole that is in my heart. I know only God can fill it with his holy spirit. I am praying that He will fill me with compassion because its so hard to feel like anyone can understand what I am feeling and all that I experienced over the last month. Endless words and pictures can't fully explain the people or experiences. I will be so excited to visit and see my new family sometime in the future! 

But then despite all these restless feelings I simultaneously feel full of Joy and peace. And I feel that more than ever before I am standing right where God wants me. In the center of His perfect will. Like all the burdens have been lifted and He will continue to walk side by side with me if I continue to pursue Him each new day. And it feels so wonderful! So all this to say you are probably confused now which is about right where I am at. I think this whole process will just take time. I am so thankful for all of you and your patience and willingness to listen to me share stories with you. 


I leave for college in 2.5 weeks and I already know that God has blessed me with roommates that are actively seeking after God which will be such a blessing as I continue to sort through all that I am learning. God has poured out so many blessings into my life and I deserve none of them.

I am on my final flight home! And I am so ready to just be on the ground. I have spent the last 36 hours in the air and for the last 48 hours I had about 3-4 hours of sleep! So I am extremely exhausted to the point that I am slightly delirious and find everything extremely funny.

 

We left the Envision center around 5 on the 12th and headed to the airport. Everything felt extremely surreal. Especially when it came time to say goodbye. Pastor Jacob prayed for us and then the hugs were exchanged. I tend to be a chain cryer so once I saw Mama Mer with tears in her eyes I lost it. In Gabon we said goodbye to Mama Mer, Papa Tim, Jon-Marc and Heather. So with tears shed the first round of goodbyes was complete and was extremely hard.

 

We boarded our plane and for the first part of the flight we were able to sit near eachother because all the rest of the people would be getting on in Accra Ghana. So I sat next to Nate and then Drew came up to join us. Caitlin, Morgan and Brittany were just across the isle. We had to make the most of the time we had left together. As the plane took off my good brother Nate did his best to keep me calm by telling me a story about his grandpa and corn. I guess it was a pretty good distraction and rather random which describes Nathan completely. Once in the air Nate has this crazy, he-can-fall-asleep-instantly-anywhere skill, which I am rather envious of seeing as I can’t fall asleep on a plane for the life of me. So he was out without a few minutes. I spent the next hour or so talking with Drew. We were both extremely tired and out of it so our conversation was fairly random but it was great to get to share with each other what the Lord had showed us in our time in Gabon. I am always inspired and challenged by the things my brothers and sisters say. So I really just appreciated that we got to get to know each other better.

 

When we arrived in Ghana we moved back to our assigned seats and the plane filled up. The next 8 hours I spent watching “The Last Song,” listening to my Ipod, journaling, and just processing all that was going through my mind. We also ate a meal at some point in time. When you travel everything kinda meshes together. Anyways by 5am the next morning I felt like death. And pretty sure I looked like it too. :) They fed us breakfast and we arrived in Frankfurt shortly after that. I had the craziest realization as I sat there staring out my window at 5 am and it felt like a ton of bricks fell on top of my head. I am actually going to college in 3 weeks!!. It really didn’t set in until that moment and it was the strangest feeling in the world. There has been so much going on in my life the past 5 months that I have literally felt like my life is on pause and I am in a dream and now college feels the same way. I am not exactly sure when reality will set in.  So that was just a Woah! Moment for me early in the morning.




 We got into the airport and the next round of goodbyes began. Each time just as hard if not harder as our family got smaller and smaller. First Liz left for Chicago then after an hour as a group of siblings we found a place and stood together holding hands to pray. We did it Gabonese style, all at once, and as sad as that moment was I will always remember it. We then said goodbye to Drew, Nate, and Bethany and bahhh goodbyes are so sad. Its insane to leave a place so full of love and unity where we were bound together in Christ. It was then time for Cait and I to board to Chicago and we said our final goodbyes to Morgan, Mariah and Brittany. And onto the plane we went. It was a total act of God that me and Cait got to sit next to each other and truly a blessing from the Lord. We were able to spend the next 8 hours reminiscing and processing things that the Lord showed us while in Gabon. There was a German lady sitting next to us and I will never forget the moment that Caitlin was cutting a white layer off her cheese and the lady asked, “What are you doing to your cheese?” All I could do was die of laughter as tears flowed and wouldn’t stop. I could just imagine how American we looked not knowing anything about their cheese. She was a very sweet lady and we had some great conversation with her throughout the flight.

 

 We arrived in Chicago around 12:40 and Caits plane was due to leave in about 1 hour and 20 minutes. I am not sure why they thought that was a good idea. Because we had to go through customs, move our bags, then take a train and then go through security before we were even by the gates. Cait went ahead of me and so I eventually found my gate and thought she made it. Until I received a phone call from her. I wandered my way up to find her since I had about 4 more hours until my plane left. Liz finally found us and was incredibly hyper but it was just good to see her face again. We spent the next hour getting Caitlin on standby and getting stared at by some old man due to the fact that Liz was going crazy and I was so tired and had a bloody nose so I was just enjoying Liz’s randomness. Their gates were on the opposite end in another terminal so I journeyed with them to say goodbye. We prayed together and Liz got on her plane. Then we went to see if Cait could get on standby and unfortunately she didn’t get on the first one. By the time I walked her to a different gate I had to leave. I am praying that she is on her way home! I know how bad she wanted to just get home. But I was encouraged when she held herself together as we remembered that the Lord was in control and that He had his reasons beyond our understanding. I love Caitlin so much and saying goodbye to her was extremely hard! I just wish I could have stayed to make sure she got onto a flight home. I miss them all so much already!

 

So now I find myself here writing this. And I am not sure how I feel emotionally right now. The last 36 hours has been torture saying goodbye to some of the most amazing people I have met in my entire life. They are truly friendships that will go beyond this summer and transform my life. I guess the best way to describe what I am feeling is excitement to see my family and friends! and share what I am feeling but as for leaving Africa and those people I just feel numb. Like I will wake up tomorrow and see them all again. And even in the hurt of the numb I know that the Lord has filled me with His peace. I am not sure how the transition will go but I want God to set me on fire as the verse in the bible says, “Iron sharpens Iron.”  This last month was something special, the greatest summer of my life and I will NEVER forget it. I truly look like I have been traveling for 36 hours. I have shed sweat , blood and tears… no joke. I don’t think my nose has appreciated the change in elevation and I have had three bloody noses today and some of it is on my shirt. And then my head just decided to get a cold and my throat is sore. I think my body is ready for some real rest! And so am I.


I was completely exhausted as my plane landed and I made my way up the escalator to baggage claim. I then saw my parents, Kevin and Patti Craig, and Kristy holding a sign that said, "Welcome Home Mufasa" All I could do was smile and hug them! I missed them all so much! Then Brandi, Shannon and Kayla came out of nowhere and attacked me from behind sending me over board as tears flowed from my eyes. I really didn't know what to do with myself. I love them all so much! It  meant so much to see all of them. And to visit with them a little bit on the way home. We made the 10:30 ferry home. My parents so generously brought me a piece of "Adam's Peanut Butter Cup Fudge Ripple Cheesecake and I had some of it tonight with a cold glass of real milk. It was unbelievable. 

I feel so blessed right now. By all of you and by all that God has revealed to me. Your prayers and thoughts were with me the entire time and they truly surrounded me with the Lord’s protection. I want to sincerely thank you for following me on this adventure of a life time. I have felt God place it on my heart to continue writing. So as I leave for college I have decided to keep a blog. It will not be an everyday blog but a weekly blog about how the Lord is revealing himself to me and where I am finding Him. So If you are interested I would love for you to follow along. As I share my thoughts and spiritual challenges in this turning point of my life. I have really enjoyed writing and I hope that you enjoyed reading them, I realize that they were a tad long at times.  Thank you. I will be sharing at church and youth group sometime soon if you want to come and hear more stories and see some pictures. I don’t know exactly what I will share but I know that the Lord promises to speak through us if we look to Him. I love Jesus. I love all of you. I truly think that Love is the greatest ability that the Lord gave us as humans and the greatest way to spread the Good News. So may you be filled with the same love and peace that I feel right now in this moment.

 

God Bless and Goodnight!

 

I will be writing on this one a few more times  before I switch to the new blog . Thanks :)

I can't believe I have spent a month with you. And that tomorrow is my final day with you. I will miss you more than you know. You have once again changed my life. God has used you to break me, fill me, and renew and focus my faith. You are unlike any other place I have ever been in the world. I find Jesus here everywhere in every face broken or beautiful. I came here empty, wounded, weak and full of fear and through the love of God you have filled me with joy, healed my heart, given me strength and freed me from my fears. 


I know that the next few weeks without you will be a difficult transition. You have connected me to some of the most amazing people I have ever met in my life. I have experienced unity beyond anything I ever could have imagined and I didn't know it was possible to feel so much love and fellowship with people in such a short amount of you. Africa, you bring people together in ways we never thought possible. You bind us together in the name of the Lord. 


Africa, today was perfect. The sun rose and warmed our skin as we drove down your crazy streets to the Hope House. The children their sang beautiful praise and worship to the Lord in our presence this morning. What a blessing that almost brought me to tears. Tomorrow morning we will go back and say our goodbyes. I am not looking forward to the heart ache as we drive away leaving all of the children who taught me so much about myself and the way that we are called to live as followers of Christ. 


Africa you wear me out. I took a power nap today before lunch and it felt wonderful to wake up refreshed. For lunch my sisters and Drew made home made pizza for the Mamas and Papas of the mobile Medical clinic. Africa, the people here are beautiful on the inside and out. Their hearts radiate your love. I will miss them all so much. Africa, I love that when I am here I have hundreds of Papas and Mamas and brothers and sisters because we find unity in you and that makes us family. :) Constant unity and fellowship is a beautiful thing and is how Christ intended for us to live with one another. Its an addicting environment to be in when you find yourself worshipping and talking about Christ all throughout your day. Which lifts your spirit and fills you with a fire for the Lord. 


Africa, tonight we had to bring one of our sisters Vicki to the airport. Saying goodbye to my kindred spirit was the hardest part of the trip and it gave us the realization that we do indeed leave tomorrow. :( I am so thankful for Vicki and all that she has taught me about living for the Lord. After the airport we went to a sandwich shop. Nicer than I would have imagined. It felt very much like home as we devoured hot chicken and steak sandwiches with crispy fries. Mama and Papa Tim treated us and we love them so. Then we made our final night complete by quickly polishing off some Magnum bars. :) And drove home as a family just immersed in each others company. And now it is time for bed. 


Africa you are life changing. God you have used Africa to bring me closer to you. I am so thankful for all the blessings you continually pour out into my life. I will miss you, goodnight Africa. I trust that someday I will return if its in God's will.


Love Always, 
      Natasha (Mufasa)


I hope you all have a wonderful night. Thank you for following my blog throughout this trip. I will continue posting for a few days if you are interested in my transition and thoughts back into the states. Thank you for your prayers I couldn't have done this without your support. God Bless!

Another day that I will never forget. :) I feel that it will best be explained by words and verses that God showed me today while we were at Point Deny.


"Beautiful words stir in my heart." 
Psalms 45:1a


I find myself in a place of peace and joy as I sort through all the truths and thoughts that the Lord continues to reveal to me. 


"Be still and now that I am God!" 
Psalms 46:10a


I have struggled throughout the last few years with being content in the person that the Lord has made me. And I have always tended to worry about what others think of me. I feel that the Lord has gently reminded me that He is the only one I should strive to please and that He has made me who I am for a reason. And I ought to give myself over to Him to be used to bring Him praise and glory out of complete devotion and obedience to Him. He wants me to praise and worship Him as I am even if I don't have the greatest voice or amazing dancing skills. So I am learning to embrace who God has made me. Because honestly its not about me anyways its about who He is and what He offers us.


"Come, everyone! Clap your hands! Shout to God with joyful praise! For the Lord Most High is awesome! He is the great King of all the earth." Psalms 47:1-2


This morning we headed out to the coast and caught a small motor boat, wore neon orange life jackets and took a fairly short boat ride out the Point Deny. I "wisely" chose an outside seat so my face felt like it went through a car wash when we got to our destination. Point Deny is a beautiful beach on the coast. I am continually amazed at the beauty that God has poured into this country. When we were got off the boat and onto the beach it felt like paradise. :) We set up our stuff on these lawn chairs under a covered area and went exploring up the point. It felt great to just talk and walk with the soft white sand squishing through my toes. We played some soccer and relaxed before lunch. Which consisted of sandwiches with Pringles.


After lunch I spent some time in God's word. I was blown away by His words. Even though I have probably read these verses multiple times in my life today I saw them in a new light. 


1. Our God is our Redeemer! He literally plucks us from the grave to spend eternity with him. He wants to redeem each of us if we allow Him to. How beautiful is that truth!


"But as for me, God will redeem my life. He will snatch me from the power of the grave." 
Psalms 49:15


2. He promises His followers that His holy spirit is with us now. I don't think I have every really processed how real the holy spirit can and should be in our lives. We have God's advocate in us and with us at ALL times! How marvelous is that, and what a promise from our Father in heaven. 


"When the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not speak on his own but will tell you what he has heard. He will tell you about the future. He will bring me glory by telling you whatever he receives from me. All that belongs to the Father is mine, this is why I said, "The Spirit will tell you whatever he receives from me." " John 16:13-15




3. There is POWER in the name of Jesus Christ. I have always heard people pray in the name of Jesus but never really grasped for myself why they did that and why I should. But we are talking the name of our Savior! The one who took on His shoulders all of our sins and rose again so that we can be with Him again someday! There is power in His name! I think we may have watered down the real power in His name in the busyness of our lives. I pray and hope that we really do believe in the holy power of His name and that we never underestimate what Christ can do. He still heals, speaks, and interacts with us. It may feel distanced and watered down in the states but I have seen and felt God here in so many new ways. 


"So you have sorrow now, but I will see you again, then you will rejoice, and no one can rob you of that joy. At that time you won't need to ask me for anything. I tell you the truth, you will ask the father directly, and he will grant your request because you use my name. You haven't done this before. Ask, using my name, and you will receive, and you will have abundant joy." John 16:22-24


4. As believers we are called to live as one in Unity. I think that the greatest example that God has provided in my life most recently is this second family He has given me here during my time in Gabon. I have never felt so unified in Christ. The community and fellowship here are so uplifting. The worship is never ending and I have learned so much from the conversations I have had with my brothers and sisters about how God is working in their lives. I am consistently encouraged to seek God every moment of every day and you can feel God's presence here. It makes me extremely excited for what heaven will be like one day! With no sin! I can't even begin to imagine how INCREDIBLE that will be :)


"I am praying not only for these disciples but also for all who will ever believe in me through their message. I pray that they will all be one, just as you and I are one--as you are in me, Father, and I am in you. And may they be in us so that the world will believe you sent me. I have given them the glory you gave me, so they may be one as we are one. I am in them and you are in me. May they experience such perfect UNITY that the world will know that you sent me and that you love them as much as you love me." John 17:20-23


5. Our God NEVER changes. As I look ahead and realize how much my life will change in the next three weeks. I have found myself incredibly nervous about all the familiarity being stripped from my life. I was reminded today that I have one thing that remains constant. And that is that God will be the same here in Africa and in California. He is unchanging what an incredible concept. I find comfort and peace knowing that He will be with me through this transition and new chapter of my life. :)


I hope that maybe in some way these verses were different for you too. I am so excited by the words of the Lord and I look forward to all the learning and growing that God wants to write on my heart and in my life. I think the term patient endurance best describes how we are to daily pick up our crosses and follow the Lord. God should be in our every day. He wants to be there for us in the little things and big. He's there in the heart ache and the joy. He wants us to praise and go to Him with our broken hearts and thankfulness. God doesn't want to be put on a back burner for when we need Him. He wants to actively be involved in our every day as we draw nearer to Him. He deserves all of us. We are His. 


"How great is our God sing with me how great is our God and all will see how great is our God!"


Imagine the impact if every believer in Langley C&MA or on Whidbey or in the United States or even bigger the world! Surrendered themselves to the Lord and actively pursued God each day of their lives. Imagine the fire and power of the hands that would be reaching out and boldly sharing God's love. But the truth is we can only decide for ourself whether we will walk with God each day. To really think about all the time we pour into other things I think we might all see that there should be time for God. I am ashamed when I think of all the time I waste when I could be spending time with the Lord and humbly serving Him. As I get ready to go back home I know that I have some reprioritizing to do in my life through the strength of the Lord. 


A little later in the afternoon we walked down the beach to a pier. The objective: to jump in... I have never jumped off a high dive or any other high object into the water. And as I may have mentioned I am not fond of heights. So as we walked down the dock I just prayed that God would take all the fear out of me and fill me with His strength because there is no way by my own strength I was going to jump off the dock. So as someone counted one, two, three I took a leap of faith and went off the side with all my siblings! It was incredible! Such an adrenaline rush.... God removed the fear and provided me with His strength and I loved it so much I did it again and again! We took some wonderful pictures and videos of us jumping and screaming. Then we went back down the beach and headed on another walk to the point. Our boat came to get us around 5 and we headed back to Libreville. 


It was such a wonderful day full of so many blessings. :) For dinner we ate Chicken Picante and celebrated Zach Kelly's (An MK here) 15th Birthday with cake and homemade cookie dough icecream! Yum Yum! Then we bonded and sang some worship songs.


I feel so blessed to have been given this opportunity. Only two days left. It feels surreal. I pray that God is alive and working in your heart and life. Have a wonderful night! God Bless


With Love, 
      Natasha

My day began with a wonderful morning. I woke up around 7 and had a plan to visit with my sister Vicki. We went downstairs and made hot water and then Cerelac (its sorta like cream of wheat but intended for infants... :) ... but it tastes really good with peanut butter!) So we headed out to the back steps to share about our hearts and lives. 


It was so inspiring just to listen to her talk about what God has been showing her. I find that most often God is using my family here to speak into my heart and life. It just felt so great to talk with her and once again I feel like I have known her for years. We call each other kindred spirits because we have really random things in common like our love for hot water and other things that seem to have slipped my mind at the moment. But as she spoke I could relate so much of it to my own life. She's an incredible person, she will be in her final year of college at Taccoa Falls. She just finished her nursing school and will be taking missions classes this year. I can tell God is going to do so many amazing things through her. I feel privilaged to have met her and to call her my friend and sister :) . We ended up talking until around 9:40 and then we had a sorta second breakfast of frosted flakes with cookies crumbled and peanut butter.. haha.. it was great. 


The week is slowly winding down as we are preparing to leave. We helped put away some air matresses this morning and then five girls from Nzeng-Ayong came to spend time with us. They are the sweetest girls, they are all in one family as step sisters and just beautiful girls that love the Lord on the inside and out! And after we spent some time talking and singing and dancing with one another we said goodbye. It was really hard. These are some of the friendships I have made and kept in touch with over the last year and its weird not knowing when I will next see them. But it has been such a blessing to see them and spend time with them again. I hope that someday if God brings me back here that I will be able to speak French better so that I can communicate more clearly with all the Gabonese that I have met here. Also, Josue showed up another guy from Nzeng-Ayong. He is like a brother and has been such a blessing. His faith and perserverence to seek God have inspired me throughout the last year. Whenever you ask a Gabonese about their future I am always encouraged to here them tell of their dreams but then to add the phrase, "If God allows." It really challenges me to let God take me day by day instead of making my own plans. And another thing about the Gabonese that I have noticed is their drive to pray for one another. I know for certain when they tell me they are praying for me that they indeed are. So it was great to be able to spend time talking to Josue this morning. I kept running into things all day I think I forget that I have these things on my body called hips.. So i somehow managed to hit a key sticking out of a cupboard and 2 wires sticking out of the couch. And somehow managed to hit my elbow on our door upstairs. Sometimes I wonder about myself. But then I just laughand continue on with life. 


We had pizza and nuggets for lunch and then around 3 Jon Roman came to take us to the tourist market for one last time. And the afternoon turned to a total TIA day. It was sorta raining which reminded me of home :) and then suddenly our driver pulls the car to the side of the road. Apparently the engine was overheating. So then after a failed attempt at using the little water in a few of our bottles (TIA) he closed his car door and headed up the road. Leaving us brothers and sisters in the car with Yoann and Josue. And all we could think is oh boy how long will he be gone. So we began to sing lovely songs together at the top of our lungs like Forever Young... as Taxis full of Gabonese stared at us.  :) And just enjoyed our time together even though the car was extremely warm! Jon Roman returned about an hour later with a bunch of bottles of anti freeze. He then poured them in and tossed the bottles to the side of the road (TIA)... We then made it to the nearest gas station where he put in more antifreeze. And drove up the road aways leaving some of our siblings behind to buy veggies. He was a bit cranky (he hadn't eaten all day) and it was hilarious when he got back in the car and told us, "A hungry man is an angry man." He smiled and we all laughed. We eventually made it to the tourist market. There are some really exciting things there. :) Its always a fun experience to barter with the Gabonese.


We left the market and stopped at a bigger grocery store to get some last items for our fajita dinner. It was the most American that I have felt since I have been here. Reminded me of the grocery stores back home. It was 8 when we got back into the car and we knew dinner would be late tonight but it was a TIA kinda day. We got home and probably ate our delicious fajita dinner complete with handmade tortillas around 9. Yum yum. I think all of us were just plain exhausted from today. Because the conversation for the rest of the night at dinner and afterwards was just ridiculous and hilarious and I was enjoying writing down my families words in my journal to laugh at later. My eyes were filled with tears of laughter for the rest of the night. I just love these people so much. 


Tomorrow we are having a beach day to just basque in God's beautiful creation and celebrate as a family. I am looking forward to it. I have been staying up too late and so sleep is sounding wonderful at the moment. I cannot believe I will be back home in about 4 days. Thats insane! I cannot wait to see you all and share with you all the things that I am learning. Our God is so good and faithful and His love endures forever! 


Have a wonderful night. Thanks for reading and may God's love and blessings overflow in your hearts and lives. :) 

Dear God, 

Goodness! I don't even know where to begin and I am so exhausted that I don't know how well I will get my thoughts across. I have been processing a lot lately and its overwhelming my brain with tiredness. I will begin with a narration of our epic adventure....I apoligize in advance for the longevity of this particular blog...


There we were silly Americans with our two cars all packed as we headed out onto the open African road. I rode with my sister Mariah and two brothers Nate and Drew in the back of the Landcruiser which always makes for an interesting ride along the bumpy terrain.


We swerved for a couple hours around pot holes, pedestrians and cars finally making a pitstop next to a river to eat lunch. I think the bean sandwiches may be beginning to grow on me.... :S I then decided it was time to concur a fear and use the African woods for a bathroom. So Mariah and I headed along the trail to find a clearing. And just know that it was successful :) .. We then piled back into the cars for the rest of the ride to D'ebel Abanga. We arrived there late in the afternoon and began to set up camp. By camp I mean we hung wire between two trees and a post and then hung mosquito nets on the wire to cover up our air matresses. It was quite the set up when all was complete with about 21 air matresses total. We ran around with and held the kids for a while before our next task began. :)


Then our night got more exciting as we split up into two teams to go tell the people in the village that we would be showing the Jesus film at 7pm. 
So we took our van ride back over the bridge and began to walk with the local pastor. He did the talking mostly we were just there so they knew we were there. They don't see many white people out in the villages so we stick out fairly well. It was a different perspective getting to see the people and their living conditions up close and personal. After about an hour we made it back to the van and headed back to the church for dinner. 

I think I was exhausted from the moment I woke up this morning. It seems like I wake up several times every night to random things. So I was up by 6am this morning and spent time journaling and reading Isaiah and Psalms. It was a nice way to start the morning and made even better when I had coco puffs cereal and mixed in peanut butter! So incredibly good.. :)

Oh life is just so wonderful! I don't think I have stressed enough to all of you how much of a blessing these people here have been in my life. And how much I have learned from all of them! They are spectacular and honestly like a second family. They accept me and all my crazyness and have nick named me Mufasa. Because it sounds like Natasha. But most of all they inspire me and challenge me in my walk with the Lord!


This morning I went to Aveadure with my sister Bethany and brothers Nate and Drew. Bethany and I worked in the eye clinic and it wasn't all that busy. We ended up just discussing life and things that the Lord has been showing us. Most vividly I was impacted by the way she talked about the way we as humans try to fix our problems and other peoples. When really the Lord wants us to first go to him and to wait upon him. The phrase "Wait upon the Lord" is easy to say but harder to do in a society where we want answers and advice right away. But to actually go to a friend and tell them that you will pray with them and wait upon the Lord, think how powerful that would and can be. I believe that as simple as the conversation was that is one of the most important truths that God has reitterated in my heart and life. Its easy to go to our friends when we have issues or burdens because they are there and physically in front of us. But think of the faith and trust that is required to lay it out for God to take care of in His timing. It truly inspires me and I want to make it a daily prayer that I will wait upon the Lord with whatever comes my way and that I would be able to encourage others in the same way. I loved just being able to visit with Bethany and get to know her better. Honestly the friendships that I have been making here over the three weeks feel more like friendships I have had my entire life. I think its so much easier to relate and be open with another person if God is the foundation of the friendship. 


Leaving Aveadure, John Roman our driver, couldn't get the car to start. So we had a very TIA moment as we roll started the car with the four of us pushing it. Fun stuff! Then we got home and ate some lunch with the rest of the family. I took a long nap in the afternoon which felt incredible and then around 5 we had to leave to bring our older brother Eric to the airport. The first of many goodbyes to come. Its sad. But I know that no matter where life takes us I will see all of these wonderful people in heaven someday which I think is pretty amazing! After praying and saying goodbye we headed back home. The car ride was freezing as the air conditioning was blasting on me. Someone in the back wanted it turned up which caused Tim to ask if he needed to turn it up. They said no we control it back here. Which led to Tim's wonderful response... "Okay because Natasha has a layer of frost forming on her eyebrows." It was great really made me laugh. But then again I had much energy tonight and was bouncing off the walls so pretty much everything was making me laugh. God is just so good and faithful and amazing! And I am so excited to just walk each day with Him. 


For dinner we had delicious grilled chicken, green beans and potatoes! YUMMMMMMMMM it tasted amazing! Thanks Mama Mer and Drew. After dinner we played a game called mental Red Rover so that was fun and then we just came upstairs and talked as sisters. What a great day to be alive. :) Tomorrow we are going to the Hope House and this weekend we will be spending Friday night in a village called Kongo. So that should be quite an adventure! I want to thank you again for all your prayers! I hope you are having a great week! God Bless and Goodnight! 

For some reason it's 11:30 at night and I feel like all almost 3 weeks of little sleep just now hit me like a bus! As the group watched a movie I sorta fell asleep and trying to wake back up is not so enjoyable at the moment. But I still want to share with you about the day and the thoughts that are streaming through my heart and mind.


Morning was wonderful. I woke up around 7am and went out on the porch to journal and spend time getting focused on God's words for the day. It left me feeling so uplifted as I turned the entire day over to the Lord. What better feeling is there in the world than just being immersed in Gods word's as you head out for the day. I think I may try to have my quiet times in the morning more so than night so that I can be more wide awake and ready to walk each moment with the Lord. He desires nothing more than a daily relationship with you and I. Giving all that we have been given over to Him to be used to bring Him glory :). He deserves all of us, not a foot in and a foot out.. something I have been learning and trying to work on. God is more than enough for me. He deserves my total devotion, humility and love. It is by His grace alone that I am saved and still breathing. The whole process of being alive has always blown me away. So many things have to work together in our bodies beyond our control and knowledge for us to live and breath. It truly is incredible how intricate everything is and how it works together and each breath is definitely God given with purpose! As we are called to pick up our crosses daily and follow Him.


 I am just so in love with Jesus right now. He loves me, all my faults, flaws, and weirdness, and He carries me through each day filling me with his Joy and strength and I want nothing more than to just be with Him. To just basque in His presence. He has filled me with a sense of serenity as I am about to make the biggest transition of my life. And I have to much to learn about who He is and I just want to find myself daily living with an aweness and fear for the one who not only knew me before He formed me in my mothers womb but also the one who is right here right now, alive, unchanging and has given me eternal life. The fear of the Lord is such a great thing that I have often overlooked! Our God is so mighty and powerful and reverend and holy! I want to never forget that. And I want to fall more in love with Him every day that He gives me life. And He offers the same to you. How great of God do we worship! Let us not forget how AWESOME he really is! 


This morning we went to the Hope House and spent more time with the kids! I am continually blessed to just spend time with them even if it means just holding them or laughing with them. I wish so much that the Hope House was like five minutes from where I lived and I could just immerse myself in the ministry that God has put in place there. I adore kids, they inspire and encourage me in all their innocence and energy. All throughout high school working with the middle schoolers was one of the greatest blessings of my life! I will miss all of my middle school sisters and brothers so much when I leave this fall. But I am also looking forward to seeing what kind of ministry God calls me to and if I will have the opportunity to work with youth and children while I am at Simpson. I know He will open and close doors in His perfect timing. God has really been speaking to my heart about being anxious and making plans. I feel that He has been asking me to relax and to give all my burdens over to Him. He will take care of each thought, desire, and worry when needs be. For you and for me. He is Love. 


All I am is yours Lord! You are more than enough for me! Please continue to reveal your heart to me as I cast all my cares and worries to you. You know my needs before I do and you will lead me in your perfect peace and will if I surrender my life to your hands. Humbly I come to you and ask you to fill me with your holy spirit and to break me down so that I am fully dependent on you for each step I take and each word that flows from my mouth. May my life be pleasing to you alone.


This afternoon we were able to go to the tourist market which was a blast! And then we came back home for a delicious dinner made by the Mong team. It was a traditional Vietnamese meal I believe of a sorta soup thing called Pho and they hand made spring rolls which were delicious! It was a very good meal! Each team member is wonderful as we continue to get to know them better, there are eight of them. After dinner we settled into the living room seats for a good old fashioned game of Mafia as a fam. I had the great opportunity to be the narrator and made sure to make my story random and intense as possible. Picture.. Amish village in Maine, called Yams, Papa Tim wearing an Apron, Monkey Shooting Girls, Horse shooting boys, many ridiculous murders like a lamb chop, peanut, pitchfork, etc., choc. chip pancakes, pool party, trip to Africa, Mariah being swallowed whole by a snake :) .. I would like to give credit and inspiration to my dear friends back on Whidbey you taught me all I know. They liked it and I wished you were all there with me because who could even imagine where in the world Julia, Shannon, or Kayla could have taken us. Lol. It was great bonding time and then Forest, an MK here took us to a whole nother world during round two as we went to a galaxy far far away with Jedis and Commanders! Lol. 


So now I am tired and exhausted and not sure how much sense this blog made. But I love you all and miss you all and couldn't be more thankful for all you have done for me. This experience is truly a gift from God and an important chapter in this life I have been given. I am praying for all of you. And as it gets closer to time being over here I am feeling very bittersweet, but I know all I can do is take each moment and give them to God to make the most of the time left here. Have a wonderful night! God Bless!